click it! i love you-lahh ;P

http://jyjasecondhandstuff.blogspot.com

http://mmjcupcakes.blogspot.com

"perempuan bha kaw ney nak", said baba. HA.HA.HA! =D

well it's just pretty good to be home. especially here.
the best part is, of course being in my pinky blacky room. only God knows how much i miss and love my room LOL.

a lot of things happened with a blink of the eyes. people are greedy people are selfish politics these days are dirty don't tryin to deny & say you're clean cause i guess the people's shit is cleaner than you are. i'm disgusted of how it is these days, really am disgusted.

okay now i'm having break. 5 weeks.it's just good to have a break. thought of staying at subang but here i am back with my 4 luggage and, yes i'm such a princess. i bring everything when i go anywhere. :) haha sorry mama gtta pay fr the overweight T.T

and and hell yeah MMJ CUPCAKES is back for a month! ngeee~ well im doin it alone thou, my girls are back at selangor. hm but never mind, know why i'm doin this? i have accounting assignment liao. LOL. gtta sell product or just roughly make it and our lecturer asked us to do the accounts. it's great anyway cause we're applying what been learnt, and that's the real deal. not just book smart ey?, you'll go nowhere. heee. idk la baking and doing this cupcakes thingy is just kinda like equals love to me. it's like kickboxing. it's LOVE. haha seriously :) weird ey?

mm oh yeaaah! i miss kickboxing so much! T.T so people, please don't say that word to my face, don't let my ears listen to the word or i'll cry (alright that's too much.haha) hmm yes i do miss kickboxing. it's been 3 weeks since last i went to the studio. neway i thought of going kickboxing here in kk but then i don't bring my glove & handwrappers. huh. ishokay2. but hey i'm thinking of joining bally dance class! weehoooooooo! seriously i think i'm joining ;) omg omg! *hey ladies drop it down just wanna see you touch the ground don't be shy girl go bananza shake your booty like a bally dancer* phew phew phew! and plus the arabian music. fullamak! okay stop.

btw about the title, that's what baba said moment after i jumped over the sofa.lol.it's just so funny.. with his expression & all. haha..

err nothing else to talk about i guess. heee some things are better left untold ayy? :)

so take care gorgeous&handsome!*_*

when words are helpless, song lyrics are always helpful :]

I don't know what i want
So don't ask me, cause I'm still trying to figure it out
Don't know what's down this road
I'm just walking
Trying to see through the rain coming down
Even though I'm not the only one
That feels the way I do.


I'm alone, on my own, and that's all I know
I'll be strong, I'll be wrong
Oh, but life goes on
I'm just a girl, trying to find a place in this world.


Got the Ipod on, my old blue jeans
And I'm wearing my heart on my sleeve
Feeling lucky today, got the sunshine
Can you tell me what more do i need?
And tomorrow's just a mystery, oh yeah,
but that's okay.


Baby I'm just a girl on a mission,
and I'm ready to fly.


-originally "Place in This World" by Taylor Swift but with slight amendment-

nahhhh you wanna know what i miss?

1. ayie & kakaya
2. my pinky black room :'(
3. my camera yang rosak (lepas bbrapa bulan d bli)
4. fashion & make up.
5. dressing up (mcm miena ckp : mcm maw bwat konsert kw ja :D)
6. mummy's & daddy's curse words
7. my old long (fake) curly (fake copper) hair
8. alida T.T (and of course : fck-u-licious gang!)
8. going to island
9.dancing like crazy like no one's watching :)) (that feels good, real good)
10.the smell of craziness & adventure

it's 1.oo am in the morning, i wanna sleep at 2.00 am, got 1 set of past year semester exam to finish. do i even deserve the 5-hour-sleep? T.T time that i've wasted are countless. nah & that is how i said i wanna change & prove to them? nah now i feel like crying. lately i feel like a bitch, a total bitch, talking behind people's back, complaining complaining and complaining and er forget it. and i guess my housemates are getting annoyed of listening to my voice singing with my off-tune tone in the house. exam's 1 week to go. i rarely go out. i feel like a fucking nerd. what have i been doing? i-don't-know.

WAIT! GOD, CAN I JUST STOP FART-ING & PAUSE THE TIME SO THAT I COULD RUN AWAY AWAY AWAY AWAY TILL I DIE?

someone asked me just now, am i stoned?
someone asked me the other day, are you high?
and i asked myself and my friend the other night, did i take anything?any drug?
well for sure no lah sayang.

i stopped drinking 2 cups of nescafe daily. but th 1st question came up after i stopped thou.

well anyway at times i just feel like crying with no reasons, at times i feel like my heart's gonna explode, and at times i feel like i feel like urgh something is just wrong somewhere.
-gonna fix it laterrr. now jyja go focus go go go. stop listening to ipod don't blog nor facebook, don't switch on your handphone, don't complain, smile and apply the secret. and looove-

nyiaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

eeeee pegal aku bhaaa

mlm ni aq rsa maw blog dlm bahasaku laa. bhs twu ka kk aa? 2-2 la kan. hmmm kima pegal nya akuuuuuuuuuuuuuu! bnyaaaaaaak krjaaaaaaa!!!!!! ko tinguk ko tinguk (datang suda sot) past year questions economics kasi abis dari 2002-2005, bru 1 thn da 2 papers gi, tggl bpa soalan jak la sbnarnya 1 paper. ngeh. tp still! pastu maw blajar. accounting gi maw bwat no 9. pastu m3 gi maw wat hw past year question ma homework tadi pastu business maw bwat nota gi. skrg jm 3.55am. mcm namaw ja aq tdur taw. ergh. baru ntah napa cam pegal jak aq rasa bhaaa.

distraction! distraction! distraction! mengacau idupku jak. eeeh pegaaaaaaaaal kimaaaaak! eeeeeeeeee nda sabar aq maw jmpa ida ahad ney. n p menggatal. hahahahha ayook. "kita harus getek yah dalam idup, klu nda getek bukan idup namanya" naaaah sandi! terserlah kesundalan. hmmmmm pegaaaal! malas! benci! annoyed. eeeh annoyed bha aq ma jantan ney kdg2. kay nda payah la ckp sal dorg bikin pnat jak tangan aq mnaip kan.

oh ya handphone ku buruuuuuuuuuk! :(((( hp org suma cntek2 (nduk bha ksian) hp yg aq pki skrg hp yg aq pki tym form4. huhuhuhu padan jwak mukakku dlm 2 thn 3 handphones betukar, malar rosak. amek kw skrg handphones aq outdated glak. suda la kamera nta d jubur kdai tuh suda kali. benci aq nda pndi bagus2. rosak rosak rosak. eeeeeeeeh pegal buduuuuuu!

hmmmmmmm aq rsa cm da smething mcm maw meletup bha di dada ku. ntaw la pa. cm maw meletup. hm aq maw bwat jab cross lead hook real hook lagi! aku maw antam itu focus pad ka pa ka namanya. pa2 la aku nda kesah. ma maw tumbuk purut kru. haha pegal jwak aq ma de. d kutuk2 nya aq depan2 bhaaa. eeeeh

hm mcm 1 mggu sda aq nda baca newspaper on9 T.T pukitae! nda buli bha aq bca d library, or the web, bnyak ja gudaan limpas2 depan mata. *drooooling. slurrrrp. AHAKSZ! ya ya aq mmg gete. taw xpa. hm br celcom broadband ku ney bikin pegal bjuta kali kita tekan bru buli bukak page eeehh cm sial.

oh ya aq pelik bha sama sejenis kaum manusia ney kadang2, serious. kejap de act mcm de knal kta, pa suma bla3 pastu law nmpk kta mcm nda knal, WTF? psycho la bha tuh. buduh. klu hawt nda pa la kan spa la aq. ini, ptuik! haha amek kw. pelik bha pelik manusia ney kdg2. hmmm sama2 ada certain manusia ney kan mcm aq maw antam ja kpalak utaknya, eeeeeeeeeeeeee cm sial budu pukitae! cibai. *vocab baru* haha budu! pantat sial* ayat paling aq slalu dgr dr 1 mulut ney. haha bodok. lassek mu makabbong! hahahhahahahahhahahahahah OMG OMG! sot suda ney. kick.

sama sama aq jealous ma lily T_T cket laaaa. STFU STFU STFU STFU. haha whatever laaa. .DOUBLE-U-SLASH-E. aq skrg cm dkda prasaan, sma la cm ika pepe. ndada feeling maw balik sabah, nda jwa aq rndu spa2. ntah npa bgtu. mati sda prasaan. npa aq cm2 aaa? cm robot?!~*&$%^ heh heartless feelingless. tp bgus la bha g kan dr mnangis2 cm budu ndada pa2 jwa. eeeeeh eeeeeh aq kwat makan oh skrg! sial. gumuk la ney. *choooy choooooy! nda pa yg pntg futsal & kickboxing regularly. and and kick her ass off her body. nah kaw punya sadap tuh! matey kaw matey kaw. sot sot.

maaaaaaaaateeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey!
20 hari lagi exam.
nahhh cooool cooool cooool.
jangan on9 facebook, jangan on9 blog, jangan getek.
sekian terima kasih.

can i just stop talking about kickboxing?

NO I CAN'T.

anyway that's not the point. the point is now, i wonder WHY is it ONLY WITHIN THIS WEEK....

4 DIFFERENT GUYS
4 DIFFERENT TIMES
JUST WITHIN A WEEK TIME

ASKED ME 1 SAME QUESTION????

which is....
-are you active in sports?

my answer is well I DON'T KNOW. i don't really play sports that much. was only kinda active in sports and outdoor activities 2 years ago, was in netball team and just went to few camping trips. and errr i jogged quite regularly. and now, kickboxing. you see, not that effin active kan. hmm

and WHAT EVEN WORSE is farid's friends said i have TRICEPS. okay fine i do. i don't mind. but tell you what IMAGINING CHYNA'S BIG ARMS (WWE WRESTLER WHICH IS A GIRL) KINDA FREAKING ME OUT, SUCKER. fuhhhh. mm btw i kinda realize it myself thou my arms' muscles getting harder, well yea before this, it's harder than normal girls' but then now it's like errr .... oh shit even my another guy friend said it's harder than his muscle which is obviously too much cause he plays rugby. blergh.

i wondered this is just effect of joining kickboxing for a month. but heyyyy whatever! i love kickboxing, who cares. =)

.......

and yes these days i feel like something is wrong somewhere.
thanks to dear alida, my girlfriend ^.^ for answering ma call at 1.00+ am just to make me feel better and the fact that she's having exam the next day and she couldn't sleep after ma call. *SORRY DARLING, AMPUN BEJUTA KALI AMPUUUN T.T * ngeh.

okay yes yes yes yes something is wrong somewhere.
that night i finally realized two things:
1. mistakes are not meant to be done & repeated.
2. you know what you gotta do, so DO WHAT YOU GOTTA DO.

and plus i need to get back on track. on the real track i'm supposed to be,.... focus! let distractions be distracted by your focus (WTF?haha) and be disciplined! yes yes yes i could do this. i could do this!

and people.... i'm sick of myself. i'm done of hurting people. i'm done of breaking people's hearts. it got my hearts broken just to break other people's hearts. i don't live for this. i'd love to put on smile on every single faces in my life.

but i'll just go with the flow. planned by God.

IT SUCKS BTW.
i just need space and time. 26 days to semester exam. every second counts.

TIK! TOK! TIK! TOK!
*_*

i can't believe i'm saying this, but err i feel like dancing in the rain.

uh-huh, last night, especially. if i were invisible or the only one in the world [i wish], i would've done that. heh. hm being here made me ME, seriously. .... guess i have changed. i am now standing on MY OWN FEET, finally. I'm up for any challenges, cutting the limit, there's no limit, and going beyond is my aim. being in college is being independent, said ms ray. lame statement, huh? we've heard of it zillion times, everywhere, all the time, with knowing zero meaning of it (and acting like we understand it perfectly well, we didn't i tell you).

yes, ms ray, our Economics lecturer brought some homemade food for us yesterday and i looove 'naiunde' or also called 'ghee balls'. i think this is the one that i always saw in the Hindustan movies, which called 'manisan'. ;P okay whatever for that. and today, she brought a container of it just for me. walliaw :D

(mood:kebanggan sikit/a bit proud) :P .. a-10-year-experienced kickboxer that is also a Sabahan last night asked me whether i have joined any self defense classes before this, and it's a no. and he said the 'way' i kick looks like i'm kinda pro. uh-huh? and tell you what, kicking is not what i'm good at, *improving on it and punching is what i've always been doing with my bros, i shall say i'm well-trained, i got 4 brothers before my sister and i, mind you. ngeh. so there's a reason why me and my sister 'quite' trained in punching LOL. kunun2 la.

and and (still dalam mood ke'bangga'an) : kru (master or owner of the kickboxing) said the ones that have warrior blood only will go to this kick boxing with zero excuses ;)
kickboxing too kinda teaches me to be focus & have stronger determination. weee~

chiao for now!~